Why You Shouldn’t Clean While Naked

Last night I decided I’d had enough and went upstairs to take a shower.

I’d started to get undressed while waiting for the water to heat up but it was taking forever. As I stood there in my holey t-shirt, I realized that the banister in the hall was absolutely filthy, so I rummaged around under my sink looking for some sort of cleaning implement. I found a baggie with a few ancient baby wipes in them. Perfect. No mess, and baby wipes work great on those grubby little finger prints that my children delight in leaving all. over. the. house.

I was scrubbing away, taking great satisfaction in seeing the white paint again, smirking in an “I’ll show you, dirt” kind of way when I stood up.

That’s when I realized my naked, white ass had been level with the landing window.

The curtainless landing window.

The curtainless landing window that is about 6 feet away from our neighbor’s bathroom window.

I’m never leaving my house again.

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10 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. daysgoby
    Jan 19, 2010 @ 09:34:03

    *spits coffee and whoops*Snort.

    Reply

  2. JChevais
    Jan 19, 2010 @ 09:36:02

    LOLOLOL!I thought shit like that only happened to me!

    Reply

  3. Patois
    Jan 19, 2010 @ 09:46:39

    Heh heh heh.

    Reply

  4. Stephi
    Jan 19, 2010 @ 12:22:09

    LMAO! OH MY!Yea, I'm guilty of the same types of offenses…until I realized my *neighbor-whom-I-detest* was CONSTANTLY watching in my house, so I put up think blankets behind the curtains over the windows on that side of the house….sucks to have to do that, but I'm not a fan of being watched by creepy old folks.

    Reply

  5. Opinionated Gifts
    Jan 19, 2010 @ 13:48:32

    ok…I've stopped laughing long enough to breath. Thank you for that.

    Reply

  6. Mad Woman
    Jan 19, 2010 @ 15:28:05

    I bet they're going to be REALLY nice to you from now on. Really really nice!

    Reply

  7. Moonspun
    Jan 19, 2010 @ 19:59:05

    uh, how well do you know your neighbors?

    Reply

  8. Rachel
    Jan 22, 2010 @ 12:58:51

    OMG. That has never ever happened to me.Really.No way.Seriously.

    Reply

  9. Lori Lamb
    Jan 25, 2010 @ 16:45:16

    Okay that has to be the funniest thing I've read or heard of in days. You made me laugh so hard I think I snorted. Good thing I'm home alone!

    Reply

  10. Shannon
    Jan 26, 2010 @ 22:04:35

    I love the way you clean! Me, too! That was hysterical… Last night, and I post this only because I'm basically anonymous, my husband "cleaned" the tub by swishing his body around in an epsom salt bath. I high-fived him over it. Unfortunately, he was unable to get the sides of the tub "scrubbed."

    Reply

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