In Which I Resemble Bill The Cat

So, um, yeah. Still here. I have to check the computer to see what day it is and I have to book time to have a shower, but I’m here. I actually got the living room Hoovered today. I really feel like I’ve accomplished something, which is sad. When getting the hoovering done is the highlight of your day, something is wrong.

I baked cookies last night. I couldn’t tell you the last time I baked cookies voluntarily. I’m hoping I’m not turning into Donna Reed. If I do, someone come and smack me, ok?

And I went to a mom-and-tot group at the library (where I restrained myself and only took out one book – after a $38 library fine, you’d restrain yourself too). The women were nice enough – not the kind of people I’m going to become bosom buddies with, but nice. I really just wanted The Boo to have some kids to play with and she enjoyed it, so I’ll put up with it.

I have an article to write by the 27th. I hope to god I’m going to get it done. I get half a sentence written and then someone needs to be fed or played with or put down for a nap or something (damn, there’s some needy people in this house). My train of thought keeps jumping the tracks.

TCBIM is on me to find some work to do from home – something I’ll get paid for. I’d love to, but when am I going to do it? I’m looking into freelance writing stuff, but I have next to no experience, so anything I do will be for peanuts. Plus, y’know, when? Snatching five minutes here and there doesn’t make for a very coherent article (as my current editor will probably be more than happy to verify). The other job option is in-bound customer service, but I can’t even begin to tell you how much I don’t want to do that. I am not a people person (no shit, Sherlock) and I can really see me telling some jerk to fuck off without too much provocation. A sleep-deprived new mother probably isn’t the person you want answering phones for you. I may get just a wee bit cranky.

It’s TCBIM’s birthday in another 10 days. I’m not getting him anything. First, he said he didn’t want anything. Second, he just bought a new flat screen monitor for the PC. Third, I’m STILL waiting for my Mother’s Day and my 2005 birthday presents. The last reason is a bit juvenile and snotty, but it pisses me off. I wouldn’t be so upset by this, but when my birthday (and Mother’s Day) rolled around, he said “I haven’t bought anything yet, but we’ll go together this weekend and get it.” This weekend still hasn’t rolled around. Every time I mention it, I get an excuse. I really need new glasses and that’s what I wanted for my birthday – I was trying to kill two birds, since my glasses are usually very expensive – and I’m still walking around with the same scratched up, three-years-out-of-date prescription. I’m a little bit angry about this still, can you tell? It really hurts my feelings when he does this shit, but when I say that, I get the eye-roll and the “Well, I’m not a gift person.” Yeah, but I am a gift person. It doesn’t have to be a big gift – a $5 gift that you put thought into is fine with me. Hell, make me a fucking mixed CD, that’d be great! It’s that he doesn’t think about it at all. It just never occurs to him to make the gesture. That’s what hurts. That’s what has me up at night, second guessing my life.

Anyway. Enough whining. Her Bad Mother had a great entry the other day about the physical love mothers feel for their children. I keep meaning to write something about it (and instead I whined – lovely). Go read hers, though. She always says things so much more eloquently than I ever could. And if you’re not regularly reading her blog, what the hell is wrong with you? It’s only fanTABulous.

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10 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Scott K. Johnson
    Aug 17, 2006 @ 14:56:00

    Hey J, I know that you mothers are awesome, but I can’t imagine trying to fit ANYTHING into my day except watching the kids if I were at home.When I’m at home the kids demand constant attention – and I give them every last little ounce that I have. That’s how it’s supposed to be. Mine are 3 and 6, but the point remains. Spending time with your kids is what you should be doing – not trying to fit in some work while you’re with them.Doing that would be a recipe for insanity.So, I say, you just continue to be the awesome mom that you are, and tell TCBIM to get some “work at home” work that he can do while he’s at work. It’s the same principal isn’t it? Right – and that’s exactly the point.Take care – and sleep when you can!

    Reply

  2. Kerri.
    Aug 17, 2006 @ 15:00:00

    I’m sure your current editor finds your work to be above par at all times. I mean, why did they ask you to write for them in the first place if they weren’t already completely smitten with your style?There are a bunch of freelance writing sites out there that could provide some possible writing jobs. Currently drafting you an email with the links. Oh, and chocolate will be en route as of next week. Prepare yourself for deliciousness. 😉

    Reply

  3. graymama
    Aug 17, 2006 @ 15:44:00

    I second what scott said!and I’m not getting him anything.You just gave him a child!!! I think you have been planning and preparing his gift for the last 9 months. Then you went through labor and delivery to bring her here. TCBIM should be counting his blessings!

    Reply

  4. deb
    Aug 17, 2006 @ 16:12:00

    oy. can I be mad at him for wanting you to get another job? you already have one. you’re mothering several children, including a *brand-new infant*. *grumbles*anyway. screw his birthday.how’s that for some pollyanna advice? yeah. I’m a veritable sprite, with my cheerful gear set to overdrive, huh.

    Reply

  5. Her Bad Mother
    Aug 17, 2006 @ 22:23:00

    Aw, shucks, thanks for the props.And? That gift issue? It soooo lives here, chez HBM. Too true.

    Reply

  6. CPA Mom
    Aug 18, 2006 @ 11:31:00

    Yes, Her Bad Mother is a FABULOUS writer and I am such a groupie. But I’ve just started reading your blog and let me tell you, I so want to be your groupie too. How you continue to write so wonderfully, and coherantly, when you just had a BABY is beyond me. I bow to your greatness. Maybe you could get paid to be one of those ClubMom blogs. You are just as good!! And you so deserve a gift, hell, a TON of gifts. Tell TCBIM that the gods of the internet have spoken and he is to take himself to the nearest jeweler and get you some bling already, dammit!

    Reply

  7. Joke
    Aug 19, 2006 @ 17:26:00

    You could get easy gift ideas from the sort of stuff Harry Potter received from his aunt and uncle. “A pair of Uncle Vernon’s old socks and a paper clip.”Just a thought,-J.

    Reply

  8. MusiqueMystique
    Aug 20, 2006 @ 14:02:00

    I’m old…but spread the word to Bartonians will ya……i wanna make it a mega-site…lolhttp://camp-joslin–clara-barton.blogspot.com/

    Reply

  9. Jenny
    Aug 20, 2006 @ 22:12:00

    You just need to go out, buy yourself something FABULOUS and expensive and then just drop the reciept on the table and tell him that he’ll be so happy to hear that you took care of your birthday present from him.If it’s really expensive he won’t let it happen again. Trust me on this one.

    Reply

  10. Emily
    Aug 23, 2006 @ 11:37:00

    Julia,Your personality always comes through in such a touching way. I’d love to whisk you away! I could offer you my gritty, sand-abrased corner bench at the playground. I have the same library problems that you do, unless that $38 fine of yours is a rarity. Not for me. I pay probably over $100/year in fines. I feel so awful about this! Anyway, these details are delicious.Take care.

    Reply

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